Why Wait for Romantic Relationships in Addiction Recovery

The more often this happens, the harder it is for the important people in your life to trust that this time really will be different. Even harmonious relationships have a level of stress that can distract someone from the work of recovery.

It’s best to spend one year working on yourself and building your recovery before dating again. However, many recovering addicts choose not to listen to this advice. Still, it’s important to realistically assess the prospective problems that dating someone in recovery will likely bring, problems that could affect the other person’s recovery along with your own. Just admitting to having an addictive personality is a huge step for someone in recovery, whether or not they say they actively participate in meetings at AA or NA or other recovery fellowships. If you’ve just met an individual who says this to you, it might be wise to do some research to find out more about the recovery process. You need to be able to accept and support the person’s commitment to sobriety, or the relationship will likely fail somewhere down the line. Whether you’re dating someone who’s also in recovery or otherwise, honesty is essential to cultivating a healthy relationship and staying clean.

Why Shouldn’t I Have a Relationship in the Beginning of Recovery?

With trust comes intimacy, so repairing the sexual aspect of the relationship may take time as well. For both parties, compassion, empathy, and patience will be necessary. Dating and other social situations can be difficult for recovering addicts. Will you feel comfortable if the person you’re dating has a drink or two at dinner? What if they want to take you to a bar or a party with lots of drinking? Even kissing someone with the taste of alcohol on their lips can trigger a recovering alcoholic.

Should You Have Relationships in Recovery?

Do you find yourself making compromises that don’t feel good? Do you find yourself doing things merely to please your significant other? Don’t be afraid to take a step back and protect your sobriety above all else.


It can take years before a partner feels fully ready to forget the past and trust again. At the core of addiction recovery lies healthy relationships. If you are in or have completed an addiction treatment program, you know this well.

For many in recovery, it was newfound friendships that helped make long-term sobriety possible. In early recovery, you’re still getting re-acclimated to your sobriety, experiencing the full extent of your emotions, and trying to figure out the next steps to take. The problem with pursuing relationships at this time is that the relationship will end up taking more and more of your time and focus. In other words, a romantic relationship will pull your focus from the things that Should You Have Relationships in Recovery? you should actually be focused on while you’re still so new to sobriety. While entering a relationship prematurely can negatively affect your sobriety, your recovery journey can make you a better partner in the long run. As part of the recovery process, you devote considerable time and effort to understanding yourself and determining how to improve yourself. You have made a firm commitment to living according to a certain set of values, including honesty and integrity.

Family Life

One of the casualties of a battle with addiction is the trail of damaged relationships it leaves in its wake. With the right kind of help, repairing relationships https://ecosoberhouse.com/ after addiction is possible. Taking time for yourself is important during addiction recovery so that you get to know yourself outside of drugs or alcohol.

Can you have a relationship in AA?

Unfortunately there are people who will try to take advantage of such vulnerability to satisfy their own sexual desires. Occasionally, members of AA do form successful romantic relationships, but this is when they are both secure in their sobriety.

Beginning a relationship with another person who is also recovery from an addiction can be particularly problematic. One of the main worries is that if one of the couple relapses it could encourage the other to do the same. It would be extremely difficult for a recovering addict to maintain a relationship with somebody who had relapsed, but ending the romance can be hard.

Tips for Surviving the First Year of Recovery

No matter how strong a relationship is, difficult experiences are inevitable, and trying times can be a great source of stress or pain that a newly sober person may not be equipped to handle. Experiencing these difficulties can make it easy to turn to old methods of coping, increasing the risk of relapse.

  • That means, no more urgency to build a new life, no more self-reflection and changing, and no more building on other relationships so much because you have a new one at the center of your world.
  • Recovering substance abusers may also more likely to date other substance abusers, a dangerous combination that can rapidly cross the line between support and codependence.
  • A codependent can be defined as an individual who has come to believe that supporting and even enabling addictive behaviors is the only way to maintain your acceptance, love, security, and approval.
  • A partner can help with the acquisition and practice of new, positive coping skills.
  • It was not their choice to use while they were in the cycle of addiction, but the harm caused to relationships with intimate partners, family members, and close friends still needs to be dealt with.
  • The film shows how the investigation of the incident affects the pilot as he struggles to tell the truth, knowing it will end his status as a hero and destroy the future of his career.

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